7 Questions to Ask your Kids After School

We are a week into the school year, and by the time my son gets home, I seriously could scoop him up and squeeze him. Being that he is almost 8, he isn't so sure about those crazy mom displays of affection. I also could drill him with questions about his day, but I quickly learned he needs a few minutes to decompress.

Since we are three years into "big" school, I know how to approach him about his day. Though I am anxious for a play-by-play, he clearly is not. He has talked, shared, read, counted, etc... all the live long day so I no longer expect a deep conversation when he walks in the door. Also, the routine question of "what did you do today?" goes nowhere. Usually, as he snacks, unwinds, and even before bed that night, we go through some of these questions - 7 good ones to ask your kids about their school day.

I don't grill him one by one until I get answers, and I definitely don't ask them all. It's just a list of favorites that always seem to spark his interest and clue me into what his day is like. At this point, he knows what may be asked so sometimes the convo just happens. See if these 7 could be used with your school peeps!

What made you happy today?

Did anything make you sad today?

What did you and your friends talk about at lunch?

Name a new friend you met today. Tell me one thing about him/her.

What good choice did you make today?

Tell me one thing you learned today that you thought was cool.

What are you excited to learn next?

You could take your questions a step further and create these awesome question cards. I love this idea - making it more of a game peeks their interest as well.

Another idea is to grab a spiral and have them write their answers. Not a bad idea to practice some handwriting while you're at it.

Or, let them ask YOU the questions  - you can share what made you happy or sad. Hearing what good choices mom made today allows them to see you have responsibility in your day, too. When mom shares, it's a great model for the youngsters.

I'd love to hear your ideas - what are some ways you learn about your child's day at school? Best wishes for a great school year and great conversation!

{Pin This!}

Friday Finds {Vol. 31} - Finding Humor

This week has been emotional - I hesitated to start posting about mental health. In fact, right before I was to publish my first post, I froze. I was anxious (what's new) and excited all in one - my hope is these posts will encourage just ONE person to reach out to anyone for the first step or the next step in their healing. Blessed by all of you who read, commented, and shared. Big thanks.

And now we've hit Friday, and I don't want this week to end with the heavy - I want to go out with some humor. Heaven knows I need laughs more than ever. What better way to find the comedy than from the mouth of babes.

When you are a mom and life around you spins, these little people jolt you back into reality. Here's a few snippets of our week - I give you...my kids.

Big brother had his first day of school. When I was a student - and a teacher - the first day use to make me nervous. I never slept the night before and was a bundle of nerves walking into the school. I am so glad this one does not have my anxiety! He barely blinked, hopped on the bus, and was increasingly annoyed with my photos.

Little sis and I counted down the minutes until he got home. They embraced, and it was the cutest. Then, he runs to me and says, "Mom! I am still hungry. I need TWO sandwiches in my lunch next time." If that's his biggest complaint of the day, AND he is ready to go back the next, I am all good in the hood.

Speaking of little sister, you know how they say a quiet toddler is never a good thing? They would be 100% correct. Always suspicious of this one when all goes silent. Like when she decide this week was a good one to remove the couch stuffing from our pillows. It was like little tufts of clouds exploded in my living room, and it wasn't heavenly. I swear my brother whispers these ideas into her head.

She is also REALLY GOOD at schmoozing, too. When driving to gymnastics this week, she's being super cute (sneaky little thing) so I say, "do you know how much I love you?" This girl screams, "YOU BET I DO!" Heart melts and couch stuffing chaos is forgotten.

We also had her Meet the Teacher on Thursday. She was SO excited to go back to her school from last year. On the way there, I again took advantage of her good mood and said, "I love you, my big, big girl." Her response? "I love you, my big, big mommy." Not sure if I need to hit the gym more or what, but I will take it. Made my heart giggle for sure.

What about you? Tell me more - what crazy, cute thing has your child said this week?

Oh how they make us so tired yet fill our hearts with love and remind us that even when the days are long and we may be down, they love us no matter what. That keeps me going.

I hope you all have the best weekend - full of laughs. Love to all of you!

Why We Need to Talk About Mental Health

Two weeks ago, we had to deal with an issue stemming from my brother's death this past January. If you have followed or read my posts since his loss, you know depression stole him from us. Some days are great; some days I am so mad. Some days, I just miss him being on this Earth.

Many factors contributed to his death, and we know for a fact he was not in control of his thoughts or feelings. This is what depression does - it steals. It lies. It's all consuming. In the years that I have lost people very close to me - and all sudden and tragic - my anxiety and even that damn depression sneak in and take hold. Now that I am a mom, I knew I had to get help to loosen the grip of these feelings.

Asking for help is NOT easy; it can be downright scary and make you feel as though you are alone. It makes you feel as though you have failed. Writing this piece of my life is never easy, but when a certain issue came up two weeks ago, I seriously had enough. When we are physically sick, we see a doctor. When our hearts hurt or our brain will not turn off sad thoughts, why do we not ask for help?

I have found so many beautiful mamas in this blogging world - not to mention close friends - who have in some form experienced anxiety and/or depression. Maybe it has been an issue all their lives or maybe it came full speed ahead when they became moms. No matter what, I have a passion that has exponentially increased as of late to speak about mental health. Could talking more have saved my brother? Maybe. If he had found a mental health care professional that actually cared for the patients who saw him, would he still be a phone call away? Perhaps. We HAVE to start talking more about mental health and remove the stigma and fear that comes with all of it. We HAVE to do our research on what options we have. We HAVE to improve the options.

I don't want to be quiet about it all anymore.

With the help of some beautiful, knowledgeable professionals, I am trying to start another conversation. I have some posts/ideas in mind that I hope will help just one person feel more at ease and feel more understood. If you or anyone you know suffers with severe worry/anxiety/depression, I hope you will direct them here or just simply be there for them. With these posts, I pray connections are made and the conversation continues louder and louder.

In the coming weeks, I plan to share the following topics:

How to choose the right mental health professional
Healthy, everyday tips to improving your mental health
How to help a friend who is struggling with anxiety/depression
Helping a friend who has lost a loved one to depression

If there is anything you would like to see, please feel free to email me or comment. I am not a mental health professional (though it's a dream of mine to be one someday), but I have some great collaborators who are and will guide me. One thing I am is a mom who worries. I am a sister who lost a brother. I am in the trenches most days, and I have been fighting to be better every single day.

Thank you for letting me share. I believe every conversation counts, and I am ready to get one started.

Special thanks to Kate at Mommyhood and Mental Health

and Dr. Jody Lorimer for your support and ideas.

Back to School Must-Haves

Here we go! Just a few more days, and school is back in session. We are physically ready - we have our goodies, but it's the emotional part that has me all choked up. I just like the noise in this house - even when they bicker, it feels like our normal. Little sister and I are going to miss big brother like crazy.

Our Back to School - Must-Haves - from the first day picture props to spirit items and lunch necessities - are right here and ready to be part of your back-to-school fun. Here's hoping for a successful school year for you and your kiddos!

Dekal Spirit Items - My sweet friend, Yessenia,  has started a decal business that offers the cutest spirit items for your little one/teachers/friends. We love this spirit shirt! Check out her goodies and see what she can create for you. She made my little's birthday shirt, too!

EasyLunchbox Containers - We used these containers last year for both my grade school son and toddler daughter. Goodbye, Ziploc bags! You can fit sandwiches, fruits, fold up your yogurt tubes - the possibilities are endless. Ours are washed and ready to go for this year!

Thirty-One Chill-licious Thermal - My son loved this thermal we used as his lunchbox last year. We included his name and favorite sports monogram. He never had issues with leaking, and clean-up was a breeze. The lunchbox containers fit perfectly, too. See my friend's Yessenia's Thirty-One page for more examples and patterns.

Thermos Stainless King Food Jar - When the kids want to spice up their lunch, this Thermos container is perfect - including an attached spoon. My son is a HUGE fan of buttered pasta with Parmesan cheese, so this Thermos will keep his lunch warm.

First Day of School Photo Signs - How cute are these personalized signs for your child to hold during first day pictures? The signs are colorful and easily visible in your social media photos. Or for your framed mementos, too! Contact my talented friend Jennifer if you want to learn more or purchase one for your kiddo! Hurry - time is running out. I can't wait to see my kids proudly displaying theirs in the next couple of weeks.

Papers Pretty Studio - My sweet friend Ashley has just opened an Etsy shop and has the cutest teacher tags. Click on the link to see what her shop offers.

(Amazon affiliate links used)

And don't forget - if you are ready for a back-to-school fitness challenge, join us for the #100MileChallenge! I am hoping once the school year starts and the preparation craze ends, I can focus on my health. More to come...

What's on your back-to-school list?

How She Saved Me {A Letter to My Daughter}

Today is my baby girl's third birthday. Exactly three years ago today, a girl completed our family. She entered a world of boys - made my mom a grandmother of her first granddaughter. She entered a world of protection - her brother and cousins awaiting her arrival. She entered my heart in the most awesome and surreal way possible. She was our dream come true.

We were told that we may only have one baby. We were told I was perhaps "too old" to have another. We were in a waiting period to see what was next for us when God gave us His answer. Two pink lines began a pregnancy that gave us our pink and pretty princess.

As she turns 3 and enters her threenage years, it's clear to see just how she saves me. How she is saving my entire family. She is a wild, fearless, and stubborn child, but I know her characteristics were created for a bigger purpose. She brings us overpowering joy and makes us laugh (and go a bit crazy) every single day. How she saved me is how I want to honor her on her special day.

My Emmy girl,

One day, I will describe how perfectly you completed our family. How your brother told us from the very beginning that you would be a girl. When we learned he was correct, we began buying all things pink. We dreamt of bows and tea parties.

When you arrived, you were quickly outspoken and determined - our firecracker. Sleeping was for the weak, you thought, so we had to design a way to get you to snooze. Once you were mobile, the world was amazing - the more dangerous for you, the better. You made me worry more but love like crazy. Soon, the bows were tossed aside hindering your on-the-move personality. You picked up brother's Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle weapons and found delight. You climbed (and still climb) any surface possible. We have rearranged furniture more times than we can count.

You are social; you are loving. You know what you want and when you want it (NOW), but this outgoing side of you is exciting. Though you are fearless, I love that nothing scares you. See, I am not like that so I am pleased to see you are carefree. This year, we lost your uncle, and we are hurting. Yet, when our hearts want to cry, you know how to hug, say the cutest thing, or try your latest stunt that brings us back into the present.

Now that your uncle is in his Heavenly home, I am seeing more and more how this gregarious and giving nature is identical to him. Could it be that God knew we'd need a little one like you? I'd like to think so. Maybe our long wait for you came at the right time. Maybe you can feel Uncle Doug's spirit more than the rest. Who knows, but I do know you bring your grandma such joy. I know your busyness and constant movement puts me in the moment - I bet Uncle Doug is whispering in your ear or even giving you that lift you need to sit on the countertops.

And, I know your plan is going to be so great. You will not take life lightly; you will not let people push you around. You are feisty and you are funny.

You are my world. My buddy. My lifesaver. I wish nothing for you but continuous joy and laughter because that is what you give us.

May God bless you on your third birthday and for many birthdays to come. Thank you, sweet love, for saving me. I love you, little monkey.

Love, Mom

Tips to Make Personal Fitness Goals (Plus the #100MileChallenge)

Don't ask me how it's August. We are getting back-to-school ready and making some changes at home, too. Our lazy summer days will soon be replaced with our regularly scheduled program. While it can be hard to say goodbye, I thrive on structure and feel my kids do as well.

But, the changes aren't stopping with school and all it brings. The hubs and I have recently set new fitness goals - and they start fresh today. Ready to put some pep in your step? Check out these simple tips we are following to get refreshed and renewed.

I was recently listening to a Joel Osteen podcast which focused on taking care of yourself every single day. We need to nurture all aspects of our lives - the spiritual, the emotional, the mental, AND the physical. God wants us to nurture ourselves to be our best version. How does that happen when you are tired, busy, and unsure?

Set a SPECIFIC goal

Set how many days you want to work out. Run a 5K. Try Zumba. Walk 30 minutes everyday. No matter what, put your goal into words. My husband has been wanting to get back into working out, but his work schedule is crazy. This weekend, he committed to an early morning boot camp, and more than being excited, I am proud. Set that goal and put it into action.

And, I am tackling a "Before 40" bucket list item and signing up for a half marathon. I've run smaller races and though I'm fearful, there's a fire in me that says DO IT! Goal created and calendared.

Plan how you want to MEET that goal

Even if this half is the only one I ever do, I am passionate about it. The race day is set, and my running schedule planned. I'm scared as all get out, but I'm going to run (and perhaps walk) for my life.

Whatever your goal may be, get it on the calendar, set your "due date," and go. We are all crazy busy with littles and life so adjust schedules as needed. We deserve this time to kick butt. Bonus: the kids are watching. They are watching their hot mama crush some goals.

Gather your TRIBE

Gather them, love them, and cheer them on. I am no Olympic runner, and I may come in last, but I know that so many of my peeps will give me the boost I need. My nephew is running too - though his pace is WAY faster than mine - just knowing he is there along side me on the trail will make me want to cross that finish line even more.

Do not strive for PERFECTION

I will not have a awe-inspiring pace, and I may stop too much, but my goal is the finish line. You may skip a workout because you need that 30 minutes to chill instead of burpee. You may oversleep.  You may indulge too much. But, you get back up and keep going. You're changing - inside more than out, and you start to see the benefits of your dedication.

CELEBRATE

We made babies. We love them SO hard. They cling to us in good times and bad. So, show them just how amazing it is to set AND meet goals. Be strong for them. But most importantly, celebrate YOU. We need to take care of ourselves so we can take care of them.

Then, go get ya some champagne and toast to those shattered goals!

.....................................................

Now, for a fitness challenge. When I was coaching, I started an accountability group of strong women who support and encourage each other. Since January, we have continued to push each other. Now, we have a new goal.

Inspired by a friend who recently accomplished some fitness goals this summer (Hey, Kelly O!), we are committing to a #100MileChallenge.

Starting today - August 1st - we are tracking our mileage until November 1st. Walk. Run. Crawl if you have to. Or, put that Fitbit to use and track your steps into miles. Keep going and set that goal to reach 100 miles in just 3 months.

If you want to join us, post your progress on social media and use the hashtag #100MileChallenge. The goal is set. The tribe is waiting. Join us!

Let's get moving! You will be SO glad you did.

5 Ways to Handle a Threenager

We are just a few weeks away from THREE. I cannot believe this little bit is growing so fast! And if you have met her, you know she's a tornado of energy and curiosity. We test each other daily, but she is my little buddy. I love her feistiness yet want to scream at times, too. Each day is a new adventure, and I am still learning as I go.

She is showing signs of defiance and has quite the personality. Her strong will can be a struggle for both us (though I do love how tough she is) as we go about our days. I feel as though I need to be mentally prepared each morning and teach her the right ways to use this boundless energy. Here's how I plan to handle this threenager - her sass, her toughness, and all that comes with the fun.

{1} Set A Routine

I know you've heard this tidbit before, but for this busy one, we need structure. Though I don't follow a clock, I do complete the same process most days. Get up, watch a show and eat breakfast, dress, and go. Lunch is in the same period of time then praise the Heavens, a nap. By naptime, we both need a break.

Of course, we venture off routines here and there, but there are some non-negotiables when it comes to these needed breaks. Bedtime is a routine too, and she knows how the process goes.

And just like any routine, you have to find one through trial and error. Since she didn't sleep well from 5-7 months old, we've experienced all the things that do/do not work. But, since my little diva is quite the rambunctious one, she needs to know that we have times for certain things. I can't do a free-for-all with her or my house (and sanity) would be a chaotic mess!

{2} Encourage Independent Play

She does go to school two days a week, so on the days we are home together, we play everything from puzzles to coloring to tea parties. However, there are times I want to see her imagination at work! She is different from my son in that she will let go of me at this age and play on her own. But, one thing I've learned from her is that you need to keep one eye on her or this play could include painting her own nails or locking me out of my phone. We are working on what proper play is :)

{3) Prioritize the Temper Tantrum

These are definitely increasing as we approach three. For example, this week, she put on her Elsa dress-up shoes but couldn't get them to fit. Because they were on the wrong feet. During her extreme frustration, she began to throw the shoes. I sat down with her to explain the problem and offer a solution. Imagine how well that went. After once again showing her and still being upset, I walked away and let her figure it out on her own. Staying right there in that time would only frustrate her more. Eventually, she saw the light and skipped on her way in her correctly placed shoes.

I have to prioritize what the tantrum is all about. If it's something like the shoe catastrophe, I will try once then move over to let her find resolution. She is pretty independent and will get more upset if I try to help. Of course, if she's in any danger (which is often with my climber/Evil Knieval), I step right in and correct whether she likes it or not. Stopping a tantrum is hard and tiring, but I know when to step in and when to jump right out.

{4} Monitor the Mom Emotions

Oh, how I need this reminder DAILY. The shoe episode made me loco too - just put the shoes on the right feet, child! But, I have to talk patiently to myself then give that patience to her. No way is this easy, but if I get angry, then the fit lasts longer. My kids are 5 years apart, and I feel as though I blocked my son's tantrums from my mind. Now that I am in this stage all over again, I am relearning new ways to work it - especially since she is so different than he was.

{5} Show the Love

When they get it right or figure out a solution on their own, tell them how proud you are and remind them of what they did. Just as the shoe saga, once she got it, we celebrated just a bit. She knew how to fix the problem, but she just wanted to be mad. Story of a threenager, right??

And even when they don't throw their fits, and you see something worth praise, definitely show the love! We are regressing a bit in potty training, so when it goes well, we talk and I remind her that she is more than capable. Small victories every single day mixed with the crazy. That's parenting.

...........................................................

Each day with my little love brings new adventures and new discoveries about each other. God gave me this one for a reason - she makes  all my gray skies blue. I love learning about her and seeing her grow - even if some days I feel a mess in toddler land.

What are some helpful ways you handle your threenager? Share the love, mamas!

Our Summer Vacation - Arkansas

We are back! Our summer vacay has concluded - back to the real world we go. I mentioned this  unplugged trip on the blog and how much I personally needed a recharge. And if you follow my posts on  Her View From Home, you saw just how I was feeling before we left. I needed to get away.

But, let's be real for a hot minute - traveling with kids is NO JOKE. The first leg of the trip took 6 hours when it should've taken 4. Potty breaks. Snack demands. He's-touching-me fights. Good thing the hubs and I have a sense of humor and that our destination was breathtaking.

Arkansas, thanks for the memories. The laughs. The escape from job stress. And even the craziness that toddler travels brings. We loved our summer vacation!

My husband, being the outdoorsman that he is, wanted to forgo the beach and try being one with nature. I obliged though you may have heard me scream from Texas when the little one handed me a minnow she thought was "sparkly." There were creatures galore, but the faces of my kids (and their no fear attitudes - whose kids are these??) were worth every minute.

Special thanks to my dad and my uncle - their great adventures fly fishing in Arkansas made us chose this place for our summer road trip. So sit back and enjoy some our Arkansas adventure!

What can you expect from Arkansas?

Beauty.

When this is your backyard for a week, you can't help but stare at God's wonder. This spot meant fishing for trout, throwing rocks, and catching those sparkly minnows.

It also meant memories for the kids.

First time fishing, first time tubing, first time on a lake. I conquered some fears and jumped in myself. I like seeing what's around me when I am swimming - unlike the hubs who caught a fish with his hands. HIS BARE HANDS. I'm married to Bear Grylls.

Arkansas also meant tranquility.

Being in a place where my dad, brother, and uncle have been gave me a sense of peace I haven't felt in a while. In fact, we had a friendly butterfly who loved to perch right on our heads, shoulders, and hands. At times, it was a bit pesky and persistent. This new friend reminded us of my brother - in fact, my son kept calling him Doug after my bro.

I liked those moments of peace.

Our little cabin in the woods was ideal. We played, we shared, we relaxed. I even read THREE whole books while I was there. Remember  my summer reading list? I conquered the whole thing (and for the record, I HIGHLY recommend  The Sea Keeper's Daughter).

We also ate at some great places while there -

Pecan Point Brewing Company - Refreshing margaritas after a long drive and exceptional eats.
Back Forty - The fried green beans and hamburgers. Wowzers.
Whispering Woods - OMGosh - the wild mushroom ravioli - I may drive back just for this dish.

Needless to say, clean eating returns this week.
.........................................................................................

If you are reading and you're from Arkansas, thank you for sharing this beautiful place with four crazy Texans. We enjoyed every second. Even the ten hour car ride home with a threenager and a car sick big brother.

If you are looking for a place to unwind and unplug, check out all the peace and joy Arkansas offers. Now back to reality...

Have a great week, friends! Thanks for joining in our Arkansas fun!

Going Unplugged - Vacation Time

We are inching closer to our family vacay - a week away from work, stress, obligations, and technology. Yep, we are going unplugged. We leave this weekend, and while I wasn't so sure at first about the "limited cell phone service" in our lodging description, I feel more than ready now.

If you've been reading as of late, you know I've had some hard times - not to mention  my anxiety - so I am hoping this week away will remind us (really - me) of all our blessings. I am ready to get out of the city and just be still.

Recently, I wrote a piece for Her View From Home. I love the pieces here - some funny, some so raw and real - and how the writers share from their hearts. The month of June was a hard one for me - just the usual craziness but throw in some firsts, and it was extra rough. My brother's first Heavenly birthday and the first Father's Day without him. I wanted to put all of those feelings into words and release some of them from my shoulders. You can see my post HERE - share, comment, and/or pray if you are inclined.

After writing about my grief, I stumbled upon these words about the kindness of others when you are hurting. When others see/feel/understand your sorrow, it also can lessen the burden grief places on your world. In fact, after reading these words, I met someone who spoke to my heart and offered support after hearing of my brother's death. When others feel our sorrow, we feel lighter.

Image Via Positive Life Tips

I am going into our unplugged week hoping even more will lift as I spend this time with my family. Thank you all so much for reading my little blog and for your support. I can't wait to share a bit of our technology-free week when we return.

And for a fun, upbeat note - you can see more mama talk over at The Mighty Mamas. You may just see me sharing some candid moments from this motherhood fun!

See you soon, friends!

Friday Finds {Vol. 30} - My Summer Reading List

Fun fact - I love a good book. Truth - I am often too tired to finish one. My reading habits include binging book after book for a good month or two, then taking a long sabbatical trying to find the next good one. Luckily, I am a member of two book clubs, so they are motivating me to get back on my reading game.

My latest book suggestions came from one avid reader/friend and Amazon. Want to read along with me? Here is my Summer 2016 Reading List.

The Hypnotist's Love Story by Liane Moriarty - I have loved all books by this author. This one is next on my list. What Alice Forgot, The Husband's Secret, and Big, Little Lies are also great too!

The Royal We by Heather Cooks and Jessica Morgan - I just finished this book, and while it took a second to get into, I ended up loving this story (because a good love story never hurt anybody). And, if you are a fan of Kate Middleton, you may see some similarities to her, too!

The Sea Keeper's Daughters by Lisa Wingate - My neighbor let me borrow this one, and I am reading it now. So far, I am really involved in this story of a woman coming back home after many big changes in her life. Dealing with a disgruntled stepfather and a declining business, she discovers a family mystery that may change all she's known.

Who Do You Love by Jennifer Weiner - This author has been a favorite of mine! Little Earthquakes and Good in Bed are such fun reads. This one is on it's way from Amazon, and I plan to read on our vacay in a couple of weeks.

{affiliate links used}
.................................................................

Need more ideas? Be my friend on Goodreads or check out this post about my favorite books from 2015.

Want even more? My sweet friend at Seven Graces has this list to help build yours!

What's on your reading list this summer?

How to Maintain Valuable Friendships in a Busy World

Life is so crazy when you have little ones. Life is really just crazy when you're trying to adult. If I have learned anything in the last 6 months, it's that I desperately need my friends. I need their prayers, their understanding, their hugs, their laughs...and their time. That last one is SO hard when you are a mom whose first priority is family. But, when life gets tough - sick kids, loss, job change, or just plain ol' stress, it's my friends who give me strength.

So, how do we maintain any friendship - new or old - when we are busy, tired moms? I am NO expert because I have failed in some areas myself, but in our adult life, maintaining these relationships are dire to our well being. We cannot do life alone - it helps when valuable friendships cover us like a blanket. To comfort, protect, and love.

Communicate

If you are like me, talking on the phone can be a chore when you have little ones at your feet. You know those calls - you want to catch up with a friend, but you have to stop mid-sentence to correct or shush. And sure, we can interact on social media, but a good phone call may amp up your soul. I have to admit - I am terrible at this part.  During any alone time I have, I find myself collapsing in exhaustion, and a phone call is the last thing I can do - nothing valuable will come from that. Maybe make time to call and/or talk - yes, set an appointment for that communication. We schedule kid's activities and such so why not a good chat?

Do Not Compare

I'm sharing this one because I have found myself here lately. In the midst of hard times, it can be hard to see friends sharing fun and happiness on Facebook. I want to be jovial and carefree (right there with them), but grief and/or anxiety sneak in too much. But, just like with ANY life event, we are all in different seasons of life. Your hard may be different than a friend's hard. And more importantly, when it IS hard, never compare. Meet them wherever they are in their journey. Be present. Be patient.

Keep Plans

When I make plans with someone, I try so hard to keep them - mainly because I desperately need other human contact. A dinner out with a dear friend or even a weekend away can restore your soul. Sure, kids take precedence, but carefully select when you can meet and keep the date. These friends may need this time with you so badly. And if you can't make it because you JUST can't - darn the overwhelming life we lead - be honest. A good friend will understand.

Laugh. Laugh A lot.

This past weekend, my college roomie came in town. She had some time off from work and chose to spend it with me (insert joy emoji). We can laugh like crazy fools when we are together - we reminisce; we dissect motherhood. I loved this time with her - our goofy fun came at the perfect time.

I have to also mention my sweet friend, Amanda, who is also on a grief journey. We share texts on our rough days that would probably weird out some folks, but to REALLY share what I feel with someone who "gets" it then end up laughing? My favorite. Just keep laughing - no better person to laugh with than a friend.
....................................................

What are some ways you maintain friendships in this busy life? My friends are my world, and I know I am not the perfect one, so I am all ears on how keep my sweet friends close!

Friday Finds {Vol. 29} - Mini Ninja Class

Hip, hip hooray for Friday! And extra cheers for a long weekend - I hope you all have a fun and festive 4th of July. We are planning a neighborhood block party AND my college bestie is coming in town. She's coming just at the right time since the funk took over this week - I am ready for laughs, barbecue, and fireworks!

Meanwhile, our summer bucket list is being tackled head-on, and I wanted to give you an update. We are LOVING American Ninja Warrior. My son is OBSESSED with this show - we watch and DVR every single episode so he can watch and watch again. I have to admit - I get his fascination. These athletes are amazing, and their stories even more inspiring. This mom applauds this show for teaching my little one about overcoming obstacles and the importance of physical fitness.

This summer, we have participated in the Mini Ninja class at Iron Sports - the training center of MANY ninjas including my son's two favorites, Sam Sann and Daniel Gil.

If you are in the Houston area and are looking for something awesome for your kiddos, look no further than this class. If you are not in the area, I guarantee you there's a gym nearby since this show has become the phenomenon it is. We even had my son's last birthday party here, and this mommy ninja tried the Jumping Spider. Despite the hair chaos, I LOVED IT (and landed it #thankyouverymuch). They even have boot camp classes too - I just may need to overcome some fears and give it a go.

For the Mini Ninja Class, there are options for you to attend. You can stay and watch (which I HIGHLY recommend) or drop them off and get some errands done while they ninja their way around the gym.

Pricing is as follows:

1 Class a week $50

2 Classes a week $90

3 Classes a week $132

4 Classes a week $172

($10 off 2nd child, $15 off 3rd)

First Time Trial: $12

Drop In: $18

$158 for 10 Punch Card

Check HERE for dates/times

 My son and his favorite ninja, Daniel Gil. He's doing well again this season,

and we are rooting for him to go all the way.

We still have so many things left on the bucket list, but we have plenty of time for more ninja-ing and more fun. Check out Iron Sports, Houston friends. And watch the show with your kids - these participants are some great models.

NOTE: my mini-mini ninja toddler wishes there was a class for her, but she does try her hardest to participate too. One day, little sister.

What have you checked off your summer bucket list?
.....................................................................................

Houston friends, do you want more ideas on what to do in our area this summer?
Check out Big Kid Small City  for resources, calendars, and events.

Why I Want To Delete TimeHop

Forgive me as I am having one of those "moments." For those grieving or struggling, it's one of those out of nowhere moments that just come unexpectedly. TimeHop shared a memory with me last week where, four years ago, I had announced I was changing jobs. My brother commented with "Proud of you. Love you."

And then there it was. A swift kick to the heart. He can't comment like that anymore.

This week, TimeHop shared last year's first posts/pictures about my weight loss. If I am being candid, I am not there as I once was. And, it's been a STRUGGLE.

And there it was again. Another TimeHop reminder that life has changed.

Last May, I started my blog with a post about change. My body had changed so much since babies, and I had worked so hard to see success. I felt great; I felt strong. Then, life says, "just kidding, strong one. Here's a doozy." Enter my new normal - new anxiety and new worry, and the weight came back.

But, with encouragement from my doctor, I had to try some things to keep the worry at bay. In this season of grief, I have two kids who need their mom. I have NO choice but to keep going even when I want to cry and hide. I NEEDED help to be a better mom in this new season of life.

And TimeHop's reminders of life one year ago won't take away the fact that I know I need to be better. Even though being better is taking time.

When you experience the death of a loved one, the life before that loss suddenly seems foreign. And when these flashbacks come up, you are suddenly reminded that parts of that life are no longer; that today is so different. Then, you get that in-your-face reminder that the world is still going while you are holding on for dear life. It can make you feel a bit abandoned - your world isn't like what TimeHop is reminding you of each day. This reminder stings.

While I am not seeing the physical victories I did one year ago, and life is nowhere near where it was, I HAVE to remind myself daily that this is life now. One year ago is no longer in my control - as if life ever is. It's the now that I HAVE to work with and make important. And y'all, I am trying so hard. Grief is not new for me; God will provide just as He has when I lost someone close to me in 1999 and my dad in 2002.

Image Via Lock in Life

And while TimeHop is making me a bit weepy, I am trying SO hard to remember these things.

Though my body has changed, I need to meet myself where I am. And be kind.

In this season of life, I need the help I'm getting to process grief. And that's okay.

God gave me my kids for ME to mother so I need to keep fighting for them.

This grief story is my own. How I grieve is not "by the book" or the mirror of someone else's.

I am not abandoned; God is always, always with me even when I feel like no one else is.

TimeHop will not deter these daily thoughts.

When I started this little blog, I wanted to promote health and fitness. Those feelings will never change because I see the benefits daily. But, my course has changed a bit. It's the mental well being of the busy mom who keeps pushing that is so important to me right now.

I went to the doctor today for a regular check-up, and she asked how I've been. Poor thing. She got an earful. It just wasn't one of my good days, but I am thankful she had such an amazing bedside manner and really listened. Then, I was able to speak to my dear friend Jess who reminded me I am not alone or abandoned. TimeHop can't take these things away from me. Nothing really can.

I just need a minute to be in the now. Not back then. Sure, I love my babies little and I like some of the glimpse of the past, but I love what's right in front of me too. Delete that silly app if it brings you sadness or, hell, delete whatever is in your life that hurts right now. You can always come back to it when YOU feel ready.

That's where grief has led me right now. Today and all the new days that follow.

Recipe Round-Up

Confession: I need to get some eating habits under control. I LOVE FOOD - especially when I don't have to cook it. On the weekends, we can indulge a little too much so when Monday comes, I feel so motivated to start fresh and start clean. And then the cycle repeats. This weekend was no exception - queso, tacos, and birthday cake. I don't like to beat myself up over my choices because I do believe in moderation, but sometimes, I don't like how I feel after too many treats.

So, here's a new week, and I am rounding up some of our recent favorites. Some are clean, some are not-so-clean, but they are made in my own kitchen and sometimes with our garden ingredients. I'll miss my beloved Mexican food, but these are good replacements. Here's what's cooking this week.

Taco Stuffed Avocados by  Clean Food Crush

Healthy Kung Pao Chicken by  Fit Food Finds

Roasted Sweet Potato and Black Bean Quesadillas by  The Pretty Bee

Easy Veggie and Garlic Pasta by  Always A New Day

These meals all come highly recommended - they have been in our dinner rotation this summer and make great leftovers. And our garden has been abundant so we will add in our fresh peppers and tomatoes when possible. Highly recommend growing your own produce too - such a great family activity plus delish and healthy. I am thinking my hubs needs to write a post on how our garden has been successful this year.

And I've been thinking how I can avoid those unhealthy choices over the weekend, and I am going to switch my grocery day to Friday and include the weekend in my meal prep/planning. What do you do to keep on track during the weekends?

In my dream world, I'd have a nutritionist and a chef to help me be better. But, in the real world, I'll go with Pinterest and the help of some healthy, fit friends!

Have a great week, friends. If you try these recipes, let me know what you think!

The Healthy Mama Series - Meet Amanda

My  Healthy Mama Series keeps exceeding my expectations. These precious ladies are so inspiring not to mention motivating. But what do we do after read these amazing stories? How do we get that motivation to get up and keep going? I think Amanda Ah Sue has the answers. She is joining the series today to push all of us - with a free printable too! 

For me, I love a good workout and squeeze one in most days (for my sanity), but there are other areas where I need a push. I keep putting off big plans because of fear. This post may push me to try harder - so wherever you are in your goals, Amanda wants to help. This post is coming at the right time.

Motivation can be such a beast! You know what to do, but you just can’t get yourself to do it, right? You should be eating better – you should exercise, but you just don’t want to. You’ve lost that motivation to get going.

Why? Because it hasn’t worked in the past?

That doesn’t mean you can’t succeed now. You can absolutely have the healthy, sustainable lifestyle you want! Motivation has 4 steps that make those healthy changes realistic:

Purpose

Your purpose is your foundation. It will become your drive and push you forward when you want to quit.

How exactly do you find your purpose?
Dig deep! Honestly evaluate what you really want. Do you want to look like those pictures you keep liking on Instagram? Or do you just want to feel more confident wearing shorts?

What impacts the personal, family, social, professional and spiritual aspects of your life? Striking a balance between these will help solidify your foundation. It basically lets you layer your sources of motivation so you have several things pushing you forward when you want to quit.

If you’re ready to hone in on your purpose, download your free motivation worksheet.

Accountability

We can all agree that nothing happens without taking action, right? It’s important to have a solid foundation, set your goals and make your plans. However, it’s all talk until you do something about it.

Accountability can act as the bridge between “knowing” and “doing.” There’s no right or wrong way to be accountable.

Here are a few examples of ways to stay accountable:

Yourself: calendar, reminders, phone, journal
Partner: regular check-ins, workout partner, exchanging knowledge
Groups: lots of knowledge, group goals, multiple accountability partners

We all respond differently, so find what works for you and stick to it.

Focus

Have you ever tried to walk on a balance beam? Think about what it takes to do it:

Clear your mind.
Look at the bar.
Get on the bar.
Raise your head slowly.
Look straight ahead.
Raise your arms for added balance.
Start walking forward.

You can picture it, can’t you?

Now, what would happen if the scenario was slightly different?

All of your friends are around. You get up on the bar. Your kids are begging for your attention. You hear your phone ring. You take one step forward. Someone behind you yells your name. A whole lot of chaos and a lot less likely you’re going to walk that beam, right?

So what was the difference?

You were focused on everything else around you, you stopped looking at the beam and you stopped using your arms for additional balance.

What does that have to do with a healthy lifestyle?

In order to stay motivated, you have to clear your mind, keep your eye on your goal and use the resources you already have.

Longevity

I’m sure your goal is NEVER to fail after 14 days. Who would EVER do that!? Unfortunately that doesn’t change the fact that too often, we turn to boring, bland diets – only to be disappointed when our results don’t stick.

Here’s the thing: if you want different results, you need a different approach!

Instead of asking “How do I get the fastest results?”

Ask this: “How do I get long-term results?”

When it comes to a healthy changes, my general rule of thumb is that if you can’t do it for the rest of your life, you probably shouldn’t do it.

I know you have the motivation to kick-start your healthy lifestyle, but in case you want some extra help, I created a free motivation worksheet just for you. You can do this!

Amanda is an average, busy 30 year old, works full-time and tries to keep a balanced life. She started blogging because she was sick of seeing her friends and family get frustrated by diets and intense from the start programs that didn’t work. She’s determined to help other busy women create realistic, healthy lifestyles on their own. She’s not a trainer, but lost 30 lbs on her own, has sustained a healthy lifestyle for 5+ years and wants to teach you to do the same.

Do yourself a favor and follow her! Her tips and motivation will help you make that change you need.  Thank you for sharing, Amanda!

Blog  /Twitter / Instagram / Pinterest