I want to be honest, I am not always a picture perfect match for what I preach. Many things I post I do so to motivate myself. If I motivate others, then that's just awesome. But the truth is, I need that push too to keep going. For example, this weekend, I was determined to make better food choices because most weekends are usually a free-for-all. I was doing so great - then I had birthday cake. And chips and salsa. Then a piece of buttermilk pie. When I went to bed Saturday night, I was so mad at myself for that lack of will power. I beat myself up over and over until I fell asleep.
Not too long ago, I did my measurements and stepped on a scale after two months of not doing either one. And I wish I didn't do it because there wasn't much physical change. I felt like my transformation was at a halt, and I didn't like it. And I felt like I needed to stop posting things because I wasn't seeing that change. How could I promote fitness when I felt so stuck?
But, part of a transformation isn't the physical change. Like I have mentioned before, I have changed in other ways. Everyday, I try again when there have been some days where I didn't want to get out of bed. Many days where my thoughts were cloudy and negative. I was scared to be "out there" with my journey, to do the Beachbody thing, to post more on Instagram, to start my personal trainer certification - all of it was terrifying. The more I did it, the more I stepped out of that comfort zone, the more transformed I became.
For now, I'm commiting to ignore my poor self-talk and to focus more on how I've changed - and continue to change - inside. I'll keep my Transformation Tuesdays going and hope in the next few months, I will reach more physical goals. And if I don't, I will keep posting motivating things for me to keep pushing and trucking along. I hope you stick along with me on this transformation because all of you have made this journey more meaningful than I ever thought possible.
With Love,
Kim
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