The Truth About Anxiety

Ten things you need to know about anxious moms. Where I've been with anxiety lately. How it is to live with anxiety. Oh so many titles, blog post ideas, random thoughts, etc. I've erased and written again because I want others to know what it's like to live with anxiety. And I want even more to know they are not alone. I don't like being anxious, and in the last few weeks, it honestly has gotten pretty bad. This is my truth about anxiety.

Too much on my plate or relationships that have fallen apart - it has felt like I cannot get my mind to stop worrying. I replay conversations or I even make up scenarios that haven't happened yet - its never-ending. And it's so exhausting because it comes suddenly, without warning. You almost have to be on full alert even when life is good. You have to be prepared for that worry to spring up at any moment. And in the last month or so, I have been on edge about it all - parenting, friendships, obligations, grief, etc. See? Exhausting.

I've shared before how I seek help when it gets too hard. The help has lifted life-sized boulders off my shoulders. But, lately, I  thought I could fight it on my own. All on my own. Asking for help is not a weakness or a sign that something is desperately wrong. In the last two weeks, I realized I cannot do hard things without a community - a good doctor, understanding friends, and quite a bit of prayer.

I could sugarcoat my truth and give tips on combating anxiety or say I welcome every morning feeling refreshed to tackle a new day, but the truth is I have run out of tips. The triggers are obvious; the worries are the same. But, I am so tired of living in a Groundhog Day type of life. When that fatigue set in a few weeks ago, I knew what I needed to do.

We are tired, anxious mamas. We have so much on our plate, and we try to control every aspect of our day or at least I do. I think too much of the what ifs and the whys, and I've hit the wall. Two weeks ago, I buckled down and started a new journey.

If you are in the trenches of worry - whether it's a continuous struggle or a new thing that has come with motherhood, the other truth is you are not alone. The battles don't have to be big to give you worry. You should never feel ashamed. In fact, as my friend Lisa recently posted - "when you're troubled, throw out a lifeline to someone else. It will keep both of you afloat in ways you never imagined."

So let's say my new truth about anxiety is that lifeline. Recently, I have felt troubled. I have felt weak. I am now throwing this out to someone else - hoping we both remember we have strong tools in our arsenal to keep us afloat. Of course, there will be wounds that still come up as we get through the days. There will be times when my arsenal feels depleted. But, with a new plan in motion, and a tribe that beats all tribes, I am ready.

The real truth is I am more ready than ever.